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People rarely talk about the real victims of remote work. Human adjustment challenges have been discussed at length, but what about the ones who never had a choice in the matter? Office dogs working from home is a subject that deserves serious attention, and we at Advertise Purple are happy to shine a light on it.
Our Santa Monica offices are home to some of the most dedicated, hardworking, and frankly adorable four-legged contributors in the affiliate marketing industry. COVID-19 may have closed the building, but it did not stop these dogs from showing up, logging on, and getting things done. Mostly.
Here is an official WFH check-in with the fur team.
Office Dogs Working From Home: How the Ad Purp Pups Are Holding Up
As a leading affiliate marketing agency, we take productivity seriously. As always, the dogs are operating by their own standards. Here is the full rundown.
Maximus Donovan | Bark-eting Analyst
Maximus doesn’t speak English, so getting a direct quote was difficult. His tail was wagging at a rate that suggested either high morale or an urgent deadline. Based on observation, it appears his owner, Jack, has been asleep at the wheel on multiple occasions. He has left Maximus to handle the bulk of the workload entirely on his own.
Jack. Come on, mate.
The growing workload led Jack to emergency-onboard Molly Donovan to assist with analytics duties. Molly has shown remarkable talent in Excel. That is particularly impressive when you consider the paw-to-keyboard ratio involved. Jack continues to supervise somewhere off-screen, though his overall contribution remains questionable.
Koda | @baby_kodaa | Rising Leadership
Koda was onboarded young and has never once failed to deliver. From the beginning, it was clear a leadership role was in his future, and he has fully grown into it. Today, a range of complex tasks falls under his responsibility, including some that humans still have not quite mastered.
Compensation currently comes in the form of kibble, though that arrangement may need revisiting before market value enters the conversation. Lighter tasks have also been completed from the comfort of his bed, which we prefer to interpret as efficient time management.
Snow Moisan | Client Relations (Sort of)
Snow was photographed mid-call with what appeared to be a client seeking to develop an affiliate program. Upon closer inspection, a very popular video game was visible in the background. Snow’s representatives have confirmed it was his lunch break, and the matter has been dropped entirely. No further questions.
Calvin | @calvin_bones | The Gold Standard of WFH
Calvin’s setup is objectively the best of the group. His laptop is open, the screen saver is disabled, and to any outside observer, he appears to be actively online and deeply engaged in work. In reality, he has been sunbathing, eating well, and sleeping at irregular hours.
As the unofficial number one office dog at Advertise Purple, he has earned a certain level of leeway, and he is absolutely using all of it.
Chief | @commanderinchiefy | Closing Every Single Deal
Chief, we love you, but please ease up. Closing on every call is creating a volume problem nobody was prepared for. With his usual client entertainment venues closed, Chief has adapted well, sending care packages to prospects and working overtime to move deals forward. His salesmanship is genuinely unmatched, and the whole team is grateful for it.
He misses his work buddies, both human and canine. Still, he is making it work with the kind of professionalism that puts most of the humans to shame.
Theo | Bone-tent Strategist | Having a Rough Go
Full transparency: Theo belongs to the person writing this. Commenting objectively is not possible. What can be said is that Theo is a very social creature; he deeply misses the Upstairs Boys crew (Koda, Calvin, and Chief primarily), and he has been sleeping considerably more than usual.
He is not at his best right now; he is still the best dog in the office. These two things can both be true.
Bear | Freelancer | Working in the Field
Bear weighs 120 pounds and has never been particularly interested in desk-based work. As a freelancer who rarely visits the office, he continues operating in the field. His current role involves building connections and spreading awareness about the agency’s work.
Bear is an elder statesman within the fur team and carries the respect of every dog and human in the organisation. Nobody ever needs to wonder about Bear’s output. He delivers, always.
Shiba Chen | New Hire | Rolling With It
Shiba just finished onboarding and could not have anticipated that his first weeks at the company would look like this. He is taking it remarkably well. His youthful energy is carrying him through the uncertainty, and his adaptability is already making an impression.
As a certified Cute Boy and rare downstairs dog, Shiba fills an important gap in the fur team’s coverage. He is going to fit in just fine.
Emmett | Director of Cuteness Management | Sleeping On the Job (Literally)
Emmett is a small man in a leadership role who is currently choosing snuggles over screens. This would be a performance concern for any other employee. For Emmett, it is completely fine because he is adorable. His owner, Devon, runs the entire account management team, which provides meaningful job security.
He may eventually return to his computer. Until then, the comfort he is providing Devon is being logged as a genuine contribution to team morale.
As our UGC marketing agency team knows well, authentic moments carry real value. Emmett is delivering those in spades from his couch.
Bailey | Outsourced Cutie | Living His Absolute Best Life
Bailey is currently dressed as avocado toast. He has not cooked a single meal since lockdown began and has been DoorDash-ing from the best restaurants in LA with impressive frequency. A few mid-morning mimosas have reportedly done nothing to slow his output, according to his dad Eidan. His bougie solo brunches have somehow translated into a sharper client strategy.
The Fur Team Keeps the Culture Alive
The office may be empty, but the spirit of it is very much intact. Dogs in the workplace have always been a big part of what makes Advertise Purple a great place to work. Seeing how they’ve adapted to remote life is equal parts heartwarming and entertaining.
We hope this made your day a little lighter. Stay safe, look after your people, and hug your dogs. When you’re ready to talk affiliate marketing with the humans, get in touch today.
